"Why are you so quiet?"


If last week was about what you notice, this week is about what you do with it.

Hey Reader,

There's a specific kind of panic that happens in meetings.

Someone asks a question. You know the answer - multiple answers, actually.

Your brain immediately starts running quality control: which one is most accurate? Most relevant? Most useful right now?

You're not slow. You're thorough.

But while you're refining your response, someone else has already started talking. Thinking out loud. Getting credit for 'quick thinking.'

By the time you're ready to speak, the conversation has moved on.

So you stay quiet...then spend the evening replaying what you could have said.

Each time it happens, your confidence shrinks a little more.


This has happened to me countless times, but one of the attendees of my upcoming workshop also recently told me:

"I'm fighting the fear that they don't think I know my stuff, when I do - I just have ten answers and need to think about which one."

If that sounds familiar, you're not alone.

Unbound Shift

Processing time isn't a weakness.

It's your brain running a different (and often better) operating system.

Extroverts think out loud. They speak, then refine.

Introverts refine first. We filter, then speak.

Neither is wrong. But corporate culture only rewards one.


The shift isn't learning to think faster: it's learning to claim processing time as the competence it actually is.

Here are three ways to buy yourself that time without apologising:

1. In meetings: "I want to give this a thorough answer: let me think about it and follow up afterwards."

2. When put on the spot: "That's worth considering properly. Can I come back to you by [timeframe]?"

3. Over email: "I need to think this through before responding. I'll get back to you with something comprehensive by [deadline]."

Notice what these do: they don't apologise for needing time. They frame it as diligence.

Unbound Step

This week, try one of these scripts.

Notice what shifts. Not just in how others respond, but in how you feel about claiming the time you need.

Processing time is just one example of operating on different settings.

There are others: how you protect energy, set boundaries, communicate needs, navigate professional spaces, make decisions.

In my Introvert OS™ workshop, on 12th November, we map all of them - not so you understand yourself better (you already do that), but so you can redesign the systems you're operating in.

11 people have already joined and I'm capping attendance at 25 so attendees get the best possible experience.

If you're ready to stop coping and start redesigning, you can join us here:

In your corner always,

Sam 💛


Sam Sheppard

Introvert OS™

I share practical tools to help you design a life that actually fits.

P.S. When you're ready here are three ways I can help you:


1. UNDERSTAND YOUR DESIGN:
Join Introvert OS™ - the live workshop on 12th November - and discover how to build systems that fit who you are. Limited spaces left! Book now.

2. GET CLEAR ON WHAT'S NEXT: book a Breakthrough Strategy Session here to map your next aligned move.

3. RECLAIM YOUR LIFE: by reading my book, To Live, Not Exist - part memoir, part manual for living on your own terms. Grab it here.

Let's connect! 👋🏻 You can find me on LinkedIn, Instagram, TikTok and Threads. Catch up with past editions on my website.

128 City Road, London, London EC1V 2NX
Unsubscribe · Preferences

Sam Sheppard

Join 400+ introverts receiving i-Unbound: one proven tool, idea or mindset every Tuesday to help you build an unbound life.

Read more from Sam Sheppard
Sam is smiling at the camera wearing a black and white polka dot dress and a black cardigan. Behind her is a gradient yellow and orange background, like a sunrise

Self-awareness isn’t the problem. ↓ Hey Reader, You've read the articles. Listened to the podcasts. Taken the personality tests. You know yourself better than most people ever will: You understand that you need boundaries. That you process differently. That you need to protect your energy. So why are you still exhausted? The most common thing I hear from introverts is: “I’ve done the work - why am I still tired?” Because knowing and doing are not the same thing. And somewhere between "I know...

Sam is smiling at the camera wearing a black and white polka dot dress and a black cardigan. Behind her is a gradient yellow and orange background, like a sunrise

Stop paying the guilt tax! ↓ Hey Reader, The message comes in at 7:43pm. "Do you have 5 minutes tomorrow for a quick call?" You know what 'quick' means. You know you should say yes. You know it won't actually be 5 minutes. You also know that if you say no, you'll spend the entire evening crafting the 'perfect' decline message, then lie awake wondering if you've damaged the relationship. So you say yes. And spend the evening resenting it instead. This is what energy protection looks like when...

Sam is smiling at the camera wearing a black and white polka dot dress and a black cardigan. Behind her is a gradient yellow and orange background, like a sunrise

It's information, not weakness. ↓ Hey Reader, “You’re too sensitive.” Throughout my life, I've been called this many times, by many different people. I always perceived this as a criticism.And sometimes it was. Other times they just meant that I notice things other people don't. Regardless, I thought my sensitivity was a flaw. I noticed: When the music was too loud (everyone else seemed fine) When the office got chaotic (everyone else kept working) When I needed time alone after meetings...