Hey Reader,
What if the reason you haven’t figured out your 'one path' yet is because...there isn’t one?
Stanford University’s Life Design Lab confirm what many of us have felt but never had words for:
You don’t just have one true life.
Society tells us our lives need to look a certain way and the result is we feel pressured to have the house, car, family and job status that signals that we're successful.
Introverts especially often find ourselves trying to follow someone else's blueprint - one that never quite fits.
But what if the life you're living is just one of MANY lives you could be living? And what if you could have a do-over... at any time?
You just need to give yourself permission.
The Paint-by-Numbers Myth
Here's where most of us go wrong (and Stanford's research backs this up):
We think we just need to make ONE perfect choice - find that ONE perfect plan - and our lives will unfold exactly as they should. Like a paint-by-numbers picture.
But real life? It's more like an abstract painting. Messy. Unpredictable. And far more interesting.
The most paralysing question isn't "What should I do with my life?"
It's "What if I choose wrong?"
That paralysis is real. I've been there. Constantly overthinking what I should do to realise my goal of time, location and financial freedom - complicated further by the fact I'm multi-passionate and want to do ALL THE THINGS!
But here's the liberating truth: there isn't ONE right option. You're not settling for second best by choosing a different path.
The Life Design Lab has proved that we all have enough interests, talents, and energy to live many different lives. All of which would feel aligned.
Your Multiple Lives
Maybe the reason you can't figure out your next step is because there IS no 'best' option.
And that's not a problem: it's a gift.
According to the Life Design Lab, one of the most powerful ways to design your life is to actually design your LIVES (plural).
They call these Odyssey Plans - three completely different versions of the next five years of your life.
I know what you're thinking: "I can barely figure out ONE path, let alone THREE!"
But here's what's fascinating: Stanford has found this works for thousands of students of all ages, even those who were CONVINCED they couldn't do it.
Why This Works (Especially for Overthinking Introverts)
Research shows that when you generate multiple ideas in parallel, your brain doesn't get stubbornly attached to just one path. You become more open to innovation.
If you just keep refining the same idea over and over (which, let's be honest, most of us could do for DAYS - it's a form of procrastination), you're never really innovating. You're just polishing the same stone.
One idea = recipe for getting stuck.
Multiple ideas = freedom to create.
How to Create Your Three Lives
So how do you actually do this? Here's the framework:
Carve out 20 minutes and imagine three very different lives in which you could be happy over the next five years.
Life One: The Thing You're Already Thinking. Your current path or hot idea. Maybe an expansion of what you're already doing. This is often the 'safe' option, which doesn't make it any less valid.
Life Two: The Backup Life. What would you do if Life One suddenly disappeared? If your industry collapsed, your health changed, or circumstances forced a pivot? Life's unpredictable, and having this plan means you're never truly trapped.
Life Three: The Wild Card. How would you live if money, image or fear were no object? What would you do if you knew you could make a living AND no one would laugh? This is where the magic often happens.
Here's the key: they're not ranked as Plan A/B/C. They're just different possibilities, all equally valid versions of your authentic life.
Don't overthink this. The only wrong way to do it is not to do it at all.
You don’t need to choose between them. You just need to see them - on the page, out of your head, and into possibility.
What If You Still Feel Stuck?
Most people live their lives in 2-4 year chunks anyway. That's why the 5-year timeframe works so well - it gives you just enough buffer to dream bigger, but not so far that it feels impossible to imagine.
If you're feeling resistance, try making your wild card wilder. Sometimes we need permission to play beyond the boundaries we've set for ourselves.
And please know this: of the thousands of people who've worked through this process, virtually all of them started by saying, "I can't possibly come up with three different lives."
And then they did.
Your Next Step
This week, I challenge you to sit with yourself (an introvert strength) and sketch your three Odyssey Plans. Just outlines - we're not building a detailed blueprint yet, or making any choices.
By 'sketch' you can do this literally, if that feels right. But equally a few bullet points or sentences would work.
You can’t get it wrong. Every path reveals something. There’s no failure - just feedback.
This isn't about having all the answers. It's about giving yourself permission to explore multiple versions of your authentic self.
The most powerful way to make this real? Share your plans with someone. You can reply to this email (I read every single one), or share with someone you trust.
Sometimes just saying your plans out loud - or typing them to someone who gets it - makes them feel more possible.
Getting unbound
What you've been reading is actually from one of my own Odyssey plans; i-Unbound is a prototype of the community and business I dream of building.
I've chased my own tail on getting clear on what I wanted to build for 10 years and it was discovering life design that finally got me unstuck and taking action, learning as I go.
i = introvert, but also 'I' for all of our individual journeys.
Unbound = freedom. Redefining success. Truly LIVING.
Thank you for coming on this journey with me. We're just getting started but I have big plans for us ahead! And, talking of...
I'll be launching something new intended to help you on your own life design journey this month: watch this space! 👀
In your corner always,
Sam 💛
