When yes costs more than you can afford... ↓ Hey Reader, "Is there further reading about what you said? About introverts struggling with people-pleasing and boundaries?" The question came at the end of last week's workshop Q&A. I'd shared during the workshop that every introvert I've coached has experienced the same challenges: confidence, people-pleasing, boundary-setting and overthinking. How it's my belief this is because we're all made to feel weird and that we need to change who we are...
1 day ago • 4 min read
Why Rest Doesn’t Recharge Introverts. ↓ Hey Reader, You finally get a free day. No meetings. No obligations. No one asking anything of you. You stay home. You do 'nothing'. You rest. And somehow, by the end of the day, you're still tired. Not physically exhausted - you haven't done anything. But mentally, emotionally, energetically... depleted. What's wrong with you? Nothing. You just rested when you needed to regulate. Unbound Shift Most advice about 'self-care' gets this one thing wrong: It...
8 days ago • 3 min read
Self-awareness isn’t the problem. ↓ Hey Reader, You've read the articles. Listened to the podcasts. Taken the personality tests. You know yourself better than most people ever will: You understand that you need boundaries. That you process differently. That you need to protect your energy. So why are you still exhausted? The most common thing I hear from introverts is: “I’ve done the work - why am I still tired?” Because knowing and doing are not the same thing. And somewhere between "I know...
15 days ago • 2 min read
Stop paying the guilt tax! ↓ Hey Reader, The message comes in at 7:43pm. "Do you have 5 minutes tomorrow for a quick call?" You know what 'quick' means. You know you should say yes. You know it won't actually be 5 minutes. You also know that if you say no, you'll spend the entire evening crafting the 'perfect' decline message, then lie awake wondering if you've damaged the relationship. So you say yes. And spend the evening resenting it instead. This is what energy protection looks like when...
22 days ago • 4 min read
If last week was about what you notice, this week is about what you do with it. ↓ Hey Reader, There's a specific kind of panic that happens in meetings. Someone asks a question. You know the answer - multiple answers, actually. Your brain immediately starts running quality control: which one is most accurate? Most relevant? Most useful right now? You're not slow. You're thorough. But while you're refining your response, someone else has already started talking. Thinking out loud. Getting...
29 days ago • 2 min read
It's information, not weakness. ↓ Hey Reader, “You’re too sensitive.” Throughout my life, I've been called this many times, by many different people. I always perceived this as a criticism.And sometimes it was. Other times they just meant that I notice things other people don't. Regardless, I thought my sensitivity was a flaw. I noticed: When the music was too loud (everyone else seemed fine) When the office got chaotic (everyone else kept working) When I needed time alone after meetings...
about 1 month ago • 2 min read
Saying no is not rude - it’s working with your wiring. ↓ Hey Reader, Last week I talked about the neuroscience behind introversion - why your brain runs on a different operating system. This week, I want to tell you what happened when I stopped trying to override it. There was a time I said yes to every 'opportunity'. Breakfast meetings I dreaded, networking events that left me hollow and even certain meet ups with friends. I thought pushing through meant I was growing, or being a good...
about 1 month ago • 2 min read
You don’t need fixing. You just need to understand your wiring. ↓ Hey Reader, In every job or contract role I've ever had, I've always dreaded team meetings. By the time I’d pieced together what people were really saying, the conversation had already moved on. If I stayed quiet, colleagues assumed I wasn’t engaged. If I forced myself to jump in, I stumbled over my words and spent the rest of the day replaying what I 'should' have said. For years I thought this meant I wasn’t fast enough,...
about 2 months ago • 2 min read
What no-one will tell you about your need for recovery time. ↓ Hey Reader, I saw a post this week that stopped me scrolling. Dan Meredith, a successful entrepreneur - someone who regularly speaks on stages - wrote a Facebook post last weekend saying: "I love speaking but it always spanks me after... today my agenda is to become one with the sofa/bed...to regain brain function." Here's someone living their purpose, doing work they love, achieving at the highest level - and publicly dealing...
about 2 months ago • 2 min read
Stuck in research mode? It’s time for a reset... ↓ Hey Reader, After I left Google, I did what any sensible person would do.I planned my next move.For six months, I researched. I mapped out possibilities. I created beautiful spreadsheets. I read endless books and articles about starting my own business.I had vision boards, habit trackers, and detailed timelines for getting my life back on track and finally building my own thing.And at the end of those six months? I was more stuck than when I...
2 months ago • 3 min read